play by years.
excuse me;

new IMG_4878

i've already told you, there's nothing much to hide.



tags;
    follow me on Twitter


    for my benefit;

    my tumblr;
    claire's;
    deb;
    juan;
    christina;
    poh;
    sophia;


    that point of time;
    Friday, March 30, 2007, 6:06 AM

    i blog hop.
    heros had one episode missing.

    have the king but does he wants you?
    pure dumb shame.

    my silent getaway.
    nice welcome gift.

    bastards.

    smiles.
    im going to go dig graves.

    24hrs, i'll move.





    1:07 AM

    it was all dead, 25th.
    btw i did wait.




    Thursday, March 29, 2007, 11:59 PM

    i miss this particular friend of mine very much.

    up till now, it beats me.
    Friends will come and go.
    its so hard for me to find one
    that can really make me smile.
    and open up to.
    talk about anything under the sun
    and not hide anything.
    have fun and wake up the next day
    knowing you have someone to turn to.
    but if it has to go,
    i dont think i can do anything to stop it.
    still.
    whatever it is,
    i'll be here for you.

    btw this entry was wrote a few months bac.
    in fact many months back.
    hidden in my lappy somewhere.

    and im finally posting it.

    and ya so now you know,
    you're being miss.




    5:53 AM

    heros.




    12:32 AM

    BACK.
    nice. so ya my size. =)

    i made her take this.

    it seems so mini.
    if i have the cash, i'll just buy an island like this.
    and stay with. .

    omg. i swear i laugh my ass off while doing the foot massage.

    it wasnt painful. it was so LOL.
    'luv you berry much' wat a name for a ice cream.
    every night.
    2 shots, 2 blue sky, 2 beer. and off to the deck. isnt he handsome?



    eat and grow fat and die.

    i like this.

    i lost money, i shant mention how much.
    stupid pontoon. and the coin thing.
    damn it.

    ohhhh.
    im back and i didnt get shit.
    im happy very happy.

    the whole time drinking,
    i was wishing i pack biggie me along.
    we can drink til we die.
    and go ga ga.
    hehe.

    and the phone rings.
    and and im happy.
    ha.




    Sunday, March 25, 2007, 10:18 AM

    my silent getaway.
    smiles.




    6:16 AM

    i regret saying no. if i said yes. i wouldnt be here alone, missing you.




    3:43 AM

    a year today.
    i made a promise a year ago.
    all the mistakes
    the garden had only me.

    draft/comp.
    i love you, easy to type but not easy to be said. now, not then. the r.tone that made me smile. i... but i couldnt ans. i pass around. and so he did, he didnt need the courage to. i was around, i lied. i needed that voice to make me smile. i tried to dail but i couldnt. till hours, but it ended cold. i miss you, let it be silent.

    today.
    you couldnt hear, i said i love you.

    LOL
    so emo can.
    not emo,
    i just refuse to pack my bags again.

    BYE GUYS.
    have fun w/o me.
    no, please dont!!!!!!




    Saturday, March 24, 2007, 3:36 AM

    single = freedom + scandals.
    LOL
    i cant wait for wed.
    fri - sun.
    omg omg.
    fun fun fun.
    those 3 nights means = drink & drink.
    chalet pics below.

    let's enjoy.
    my biggie me fingers.
    peek-ka
    hungry girl + angry girl.
    = i wanna bite you.

    introducing.
    mini-me and biggie me

    dont u feel like piak her face.
    wats life w/o this.
    our leftovers to go home.

    chalet

    old sch bus.

    smart linkie drops the 50 cent
    in the small lil tinny winnnn-ny hole.

    get it out boys!!

    as usual.
    the hyper linkie.
    'save me i wanna go homeeeee.'

    after 3nights.
    im home.




    Friday, March 23, 2007, 1:00 AM

    this is the 11th time i pick up the phone.
    but im still not dailing the number.

    i miss you.
    and then i think again.

    maybe you're happy.

    oh fuck.




    Thursday, March 22, 2007, 6:29 AM

    back from the chalet.

    with no alcohol,
    i was about to cab home.

    i was the chief.
    and yes i heard the prawns was yummy.
    ha.

    with my leg half gone and my shoulder about to break.
    i still make it through.
    fun night with them i will never miss.

    they had to cab back and brew the alcohol.
    and all the games.
    7-up, never ever, 1 girl kana fuck ar, hand game, chicken game,
    'who huh what' game
    (the funniest game that made my laughter became a drinking non-stop).
    many more.
    the liquor came in fast.

    a short nap i took.
    with one side playing mahjong
    another playing racing.

    and after that a good talk with the boys.
    and that marks the end of my r/s with my girlfriend.
    'she' was my walking stick.
    with low cash we still cab.

    pictures tml.
    how our 50cent got stuck in a lollipop machine.
    and linkie the die hard guy..
    refuse to move til he rescue it.

    thanks darling,
    your sweet makes my leg walk another mile.

    =)
    im tired, no grey's anatomy tonight.

    im confuse, very confuse.
    you left me speechless tonight.
    confession of love.

    goodnight and goodmorning..




    Wednesday, March 21, 2007, 7:14 PM

    eeeeeeeerrrrrrghghhghggh.
    im done asking for favours.

    it hurts but i will move my ass to get some food.
    im going to the chalet,
    and god bless if i fall again.

    eeeeeks.
    im so fucking hungry..

    bye.




    12:48 AM

    Life alone
    xxx says: you should write names in your blog.
    me says: you're not the first to complain.
    me says: that you dont understand a shit.
    xxx says: its not that, you're giving people hope.
    me says: what shit.

    that brings me to this.

    i was talking to someone very close to me.
    and it went (in terms of blogging and not talking)

    i realise as we get older, it's harder to get into a r/s. not because the girls are running out. it's just that we are more aware of the consequences. her reply a very agreeable yes.

    All the unanswered question

    im not ready to take whats ahead. living life like this can be lonely at times. but to trade those painful arguments with loneliness. i'm just not ready for it. i refuse to step into any commitments until im ready. im really not good at commitments. (im gonna get crap, im being honest here!)

    as much as you're trying to adapt the change in me.
    me, myself is struggling.

    after hopping and hopping.
    karma did say hi to me in a very not friendly way.
    but im still here today. ha.

    i always thought life alone was that bad.
    but im enjoying it.

    me says: read my next entry, there's no hope.
    xxx says: LOL

    Being heartless

    all the crude words being mention right in front of me.
    picking it up, fixing it half-way and leaving it.
    my bad.
    im sorry im not cut up for it.

    as the old saying goes.
    time will heal.

    and yes i just fall down a flight of stairs.
    i have no idea how am i going to go to the chalet tml.
    i landed in a bad position.
    im in pain.

    arghhhh.




    Tuesday, March 20, 2007, 12:35 AM

    honesty;

    the truth is always harder to take.
    what if i said yes.

    its too complicated.
    let it just be no.

    correction;

    maybe i did say smth wrong.
    let me correct.
    it was meant for you both.
    if you havent left
    it would be for you.
    but when i was doing it.
    i felt for her.

    and that reminds me.
    am i still going to sit here
    and let things pass.




    Monday, March 19, 2007, 3:30 AM


    A long entry.
    i know things are complicated enough.
    let it be out today.
    this entry was suppose to be out way back.
    certain reasons.
    til today nothings change.
    that window i'll never miss.
    a year,
    all the thoughts.
    i just couldnt find the courage
    to face what was left.
    you were always here,
    but i was never there.
    im sorry, i really am.
    someone said
    'she's the one, wrong time'
    ytd's home party

    HAHAHAH expired beeer.
    who's house next!!!!!!!
    i cant wait for steamboat, prawning and whatever thats plan.

    to that someone.
    thanks for clearing the air
    and making me understand.
    you're missed too. =)


    today
    results out.
    i drove (not in school).

    kris, i owe you one big meal.
    B+, only 3 hours and you made me understand.
    thanks!!!! =)

    i still feel like shit.
    there's still smth wrong with me.
    cry kayne why cant you just cry.
    argh.lol
    juan that one last cry song was so wrong.
    people just dont cry after that.
    ha.

    oh ya.
    before i end this entry

    its none of your business.
    fuckkk off.
    stop being a slut.
    fuck face.

    i dont wish walk away, please stop me. i miss you




    Sunday, March 18, 2007, 8:17 PM

    running around.

    they couldnt take it,
    so cant you.

    i love you
    and you would never know.

    should it be close or fought?




    Saturday, March 17, 2007, 9:26 AM

    i hate dragon year.
    thou im born in one.
    but its pissing.

    5 months til the next tp.
    pls tell me wtf.

    my mum's outta town
    means, free car.
    but i cant drive it.

    and she's so gonna be outta town every now and then
    argh.

    still, i miss her.
    no allowance til she returns.

    and i need to do smth in the night.
    considering the distance.
    im not taking a cab.

    so fuck fuck.
    mass msg.
    someone please reply and save my ass.

    im happy waiting thou. but im worried.
    yet its funny, im never happy waiting.
    okay that ans my qn ive been thinking for the last 4 months?

    talking about it.
    GUYS PAY YOUR DEBTS IT'S 4 FREAKING MONTHS.




    4:20 AM

    lil area.

    i created it, beside my bed.

    pictures,
    sleeping bag,
    cds,
    ash tray,
    pillows,
    lappy,
    minature car light.

    there you go, my own space.

    with a great view of blocks, roads, car.

    ive been sitting here for hours.
    three hours.
    more to come.




    im waiting and i realise i love you.




    Friday, March 16, 2007, 7:02 PM

    i need another planner (driving)

    is it an excuse or i really needed help.
    between me and you.
    i guess it's both.

    someone ask me
    why am i so sure it wasnt for me.

    you gave me the comfirmation on the phone.
    and if it was for me,
    it wouldnt have took you so long to post.

    the voice,
    it just brought me back awhile.

    somethings are better left untouch.

    do not ask anything about this entry.

    im late, shit.....




    2:42 AM

    terms/names we both gave.
    you were the one.
    who said that it shouldnt be pass on.
    my bad for the first one.
    why then continue.

    i just realise the more you hate someone
    the more you become like them.

    sucha heartless creature i am.
    okay fine i admit.

    it's time for refreshment course.
    and it's time to take a u-turn.

    i dont have to see you to love you.
    i dont have to call you to feel you.
    that's what i like.

    today after driving
    jilly pop out a bag of
    tissues and sweets.
    tt's the reason why im recovering well
    smiles.

    and today's called the end of hell;




    Thursday, March 15, 2007, 5:33 AM

    hehehe.
    rubber duckiiiiieeeeeeee.
    when you bite your lips and chew it.
    hahahaa.
    you get shittifieeeed lippps.
    buckets of darkish reddish weirdish greeenish liquid.
    tissuess of different brands.
    im sick.
    arghhhhhhhhhh.
    rubber duckkkkieee.




    Wednesday, March 14, 2007, 2:30 AM

    it did indeed
    like how everyone predicted.
    my body took its fall today.




    Tuesday, March 13, 2007, 4:05 AM

    okay im irritated.
    calling hours.
    6am - 4pm.
    unless you have a reason.
    and the only reason valid is morning call.

    except.
    ya.

    i have driving.
    i have to wake up.
    better wake up.
    if not its the 6 im skipping.

    imissyoualr.




    Monday, March 12, 2007, 3:32 AM

    that last entry was place for 2 hours.
    your lost.

    i counted cabs with a shot glass and ciggies beside.
    im not working, in the comfort of my own home.

    losing one side, gaining another.
    tolerance/temper no more,
    selective hearing/ignorance bliss, way to go.

    only certain when it's certain.

    i love you tube,
    mind your language.
    omg so funnny.
    old school,
    my childhood fav show.




    Sunday, March 11, 2007, 6:48 AM

    omg that annoying whole mama thingy
    is in my bloody head.

    freeeeeedommmmmmm.
    enjoyed.

    =)

    im selfish when it comes to loving you.
    that i admit.




    Saturday, March 10, 2007, 5:11 PM

    how wonderful life is...

    i woke up thinking.
    i went to bed thinking.

    you fill my mind...

    morning kiddos,
    IM A HAPPY KID.
    zzz




    4:47 AM

    beautiful night.




    Friday, March 09, 2007, 3:47 AM

    today was movie, a stupid one.
    today was clubbing, with old time frens.
    today was nothing.
    cause no one attracts me like you do.

    lalala.
    herstory.
    lalala.

    im tired.

    happy bday eE, =)
    its been four years, never a day w/o missing you.
    smiles.




    Thursday, March 08, 2007, 2:37 AM

    OPEN YOUR EYES.
    i recieve a bloody disturbing msg.
    No1 its history to me.
    No2 i was in the picture but im not anymore.
    so get a life.
    Kite outing


    3.50 kite, we almost got this!
    the chasing of kites.
    jerome chasing after jeremy
    'run run run run'

    our 6dollar kite, its suppose to be able to fly better.

    jeremy holding the kite,jerome holding the string. both running. we dont know how to fly la!

    HAHA running so that the kite can fly.
    looking at kai wen running round and round.
    romantic huh.
    i still dont understand why my gf let some guy hold her. LOL
    i just love those trees.
    snapshot.
    all super tired, after passing the kite and runnning after each other.
    can you see the split? half raining half not.
    arrival of linkie for steam boat. i feed him throughout!
    jerome's skillful crab chopping.

    if you ever wanna fly kite. buy the 2.50/ paper made. everyone was using that and their kites were like way beyond clouds. im serious. we couldnt even see it. and ours couldnt fly the whole time except when we run.

    while you're sound asleep, im missing you.
    smilessss =0




    Wednesday, March 07, 2007, 5:49 AM

    is it the days or is it just me.

    i run with them today.
    chasing, kites.
    still i cant sleep.

    i wasted my energy, cooking bbq meat (chicken/pork), name it you have it for linkie boy.
    and i still cant sleep.

    i only sleep 2-4 hours a day.
    im extremely tired.
    but i just cant sleep at night.

    and to make things worst.
    ive fallen in love with grey's anatomy.

    finally i got all of them.
    and i watch 3ep, i still cant sleep.

    i got driving at 12.45.

    fuck insomnia.
    if my mum wins some big toto.
    i'll get her to hire a teacher/tutor to my place every night.
    this i promise you.

    fuck insomnia.
    i have since i was young.
    its just night that i cant sleep.
    please explain to me why.

    =/




    Monday, March 05, 2007, 3:12 PM

    a test of trust;

    everyone failed me.
    everyone including myself.




    5:02 AM

    big talk;
    you choose to read this,
    you choose to believe what you read.
    and so be it.
    dont put it like i said it.
    its typed.
    left w me; from far, from near, im here.

    near yet far,
    far yet near.
    so similar yet different.
    how do we explain what we feel.
    as thought,
    but why when it struck,
    im in tears.

    i see you there but you aint here.
    i want to move
    but what would you be missing.

    i have so much to ask
    but which truth can i take.

    i trust only me.
    and it hurts.

    it's hard but im acting up for good.

    honestly,
    please dont, cause you're someone i cant lose.
    honestly,
    you shouldnt have said goodnight.

    itunes on;
    stop stop stop,i'm not listeningyou can save your breath.i don't wanna hear the rumors people are spreading.why, why do people go out of there way to try to bring us down they wanna know about us
    i see your lips moving but I don't hear nothing everybody talking like they really know something about us.but they don't know nothing about us




    12:52 AM

    i quit.
    as in real terms.

    its up to you to predict.




    Sunday, March 04, 2007, 5:07 AM

    small talk;
    xxx: macwings w/o bones
    me: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.
    xxx: you like bones.
    me: STOP IT LA DONT REMIND ME LIAO LA.
    xxx: you like bones.
    me: SO LONG PLS.
    xxx: you like bones.
    me: im gonna block you.
    xxx: you see told you, you like bones.
    me: KNN!
    xxx: block la, you like bones.
    YOU SHOULD DIE!
    LOL
    asked,
    i laugh.

    why think,
    when its outta thoughts.
    agreed & assured,
    a smile in your sleep.

    while your body lies next to mine,
    im grinning.
    cause i know you're the one for me.

    on the roads tonight,
    you're sucha show stopper.
    on the streets tonight,
    you're sucha beauty i cant resist.

    if you have doubts,
    dont ask.
    just feel me.

    and im tired.
    while you smile,
    i gave a kiss.

    gotta be you;

    while i drive, you rest on my arms.
    illegal but it's just a price im willing to pay for.

    read, read, read.
    what do you think?=)

    the highlights, soon be said.
    just your trust honey;




    Saturday, March 03, 2007, 2:54 AM

    minor, no more.
    ive to tell you.
    youve to know.
    but if you dont want to,
    please let me know.





    Friday, March 02, 2007, 7:18 AM

    goodmorning and goodnight.
    our needs in life.
    our first home stayed boys night out.
    one-three tai, 1 shots.
    4&5 tai, 2 shots.
    everyone drinks if zi m..
    (how to spell,LOL)
    the cheeky linkie as usual
    handsome boy smiles,
    must be winning la.
    the wah piang face.
    sulks,
    hard yet soft noodle.
    si beh ah pek
    before it strikes 3.33am
    in the middle of the road

    in the midst of e ghostly convo
    i love this pic.
    except happy jerome.
    the rest look like they rather die than have the pic taken.
    jeremy's guest room.
    i slept smilling,
    on the bed beside one another.
    6 of us pack in the room.
    a love even a lover cant give.
    it was so lovely sweet.
    quality time spent.
    those are who i adore.
    and like what we said.
    we mug for 4 days,
    we deserve this.

    dont forget tues and fri plans guys.
    kite kite kite

    im so sleepy,
    goodnight.
    3-4 hrs a day,
    finally.
    im sleeping til tml.
    cheers.




    Thursday, March 01, 2007, 3:21 AM

    the send button for the first time was so hard to press.
    but at that lecture,
    i stayed for hours.
    with that that page that i couldnt remove.
    some which wrote, a curse if remove.
    and maybe i refuse to ink it over.
    i dont know.
    that mix feelings then and then.

    hmmm.
    change my thoughts once again,
    when since it was already out the door.
    i wonder what took me so long to decide.

    it didnt tally with the rumours.
    and how what i saw things to be.
    its crazy.
    but somehow that click and that button made me realise.
    for this time i believe.
    even if it isnt true,
    and another lie sets in.
    it's just another pain that has already and would be another numb.

    seeing through the days.
    i see no wrong in right any longer.
    how the bright has begin to shine.and the enjoyment im having.
    and i thought,

    its just a missing chair.
    shall it be replace or remove.

    till it's remove then it would be replace.
    maybe it already did,
    like how i thought it did.

    maybe for that second it's just the memories.
    i shall not know and i dont want to figure.

    & i got an umbrella.
    i even use it out in the open
    that makes a diff, you know that dont you?

    i've to be up by 6, should i sleep or mug.

    thanks kris for staying up with me and teach me. =)
    and deb,eliza and aj.




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